Mylah's Got Jokes!

Okay... now I want you to take a good look at that photo! Notice that Mylah is laughing in a very jolly way and my smile is one of surprise and embarrassing wonder! So there is a story to this amazing photo, that I will for sure scrapbook for my little girl but I wanted to share it with you too!

Last weekend, when we were at the Finch playing Hiding-Go-Seek with Grandma. We stopped a couple times to capture some amazing mommy and daughter moment shots. Now if you know me, you know there was a lot of laughing happening and if you ever heard me laugh. You know people noticed. Now my daughter in this shot, looks at me and states, "Mommy, I can laugh like you!" Then proceeds to let out this high pitch shriek, kinda like a witch hackle! I couldn't believe it and my Mom busted up laughing and took this shot! My daughter... I tell you what! I love that little girl so much and can't imagine my life without her. Oh the laughs I would be without!!! She's just like me!!! WOW!

Jesus prays for me? What?!?!?

Okay... so for the last few weeks, I have been jumping into the word like crazy. It's almost become an obsession of mine. I can't seem to get enough of the bible and what it has to say. Now it's not because I got nothing better to do or feel this total purpose -aka- guilt to read the bible but instead, feel this peace about me and I almost feel like that window of communication with that amazing God of ours, is getting bigger. I am understanding more and the more I understand... it seems like God says... "Okay, here one more piece of the puzzle to your divine purpose I made for you!" It's amazing!!!

Anyways... way off subject!

This week, I have been teaching myself about prayer and how important it is to pray. Now for some people, the only time they pray is right before taking a pregancy test or an exam at school but for some others... it's only when life totally roars out of control and the only one that seems to listen, is God. Okay wait... Those were my only reasons to pray. WELL, the only reasons and times I "use" to pray.

See I felt ridiculas to sit in a room and talk to someone that I didn't see and then, if someone else heard me praying... WOW! Then I would always question, how do we ever really know if God heard us?

Hello!?!?!?

In the world according to WIKIAnwsers... there are over 2.1 billion Christians in the world. Now being the bunisess math geek that I am... I have to put numbers on this whole ordeal... So let's just say, that 1% of that 2.1 billion Christians pray at once. That's 21,000,000 people praying at one time. Now being that I am female and we are gifted with this amazing talent to follow a conversation with a couple of people at once, there is no way I could follow 21 million people talking at once! Yeah, not so much!!! NOW let's say that out of the 21 million praying at once... 1% has "real" needs. Meaning family members dying, lost job or something that is really terrible happening in their life... that is 21,000. Okay... are you seeing where my problem comes in. I find it hard to believe anything going on in my life, out numbers any of those other prayers, so why would mine be heard by my God? Why would my prayer mean anything to Him? I mean God has more important things to worry about, then Christina here in little old Spokane! Well, today's lesson... really did a number on me today!

So I am going through the regular bible verses this online bible study tells me to read. Going through and basically reading the same thing over and over again, but just in different text.

First, Moses Prayed and from what I understand, Moses is considered the founder of the church body. Don't hold me to that now, because I could be way off track since I am still learning!!!! However, that is what I am getting out all the stuff I have read. So if our founder and/or leader does this, they are showing us a model of how God wants us to live. Moses wasn't above God anymore than we are, so if Moses needs to pray... we need to pray too and realize... Moses was choosen to part seas. So what quilifies us to thinking we don't need prayer in our life!

Secondly, Jesus Prayed. Okay...now this was a little hard for me to really grasp. Why would Jesus pray? This man who can heal the blind and leprosy with just His words. Am I the only one that finds this a little baffling? Then I read this bible verse... Luke 22.31-32 which is....

"Simon, Simon, listen! Satan has asked permission to sift all of you like wheat, but I have prayed for you that your own faith may not fail. When you have come back, you must strengthen your brothers."

Holy cow! Right there in front of my eyes, is the most amazing passage ever and totally talks to my heart and I stop and just chew on that. The whole idea that Jesus knows, "we" are sinners, we basically suck ~ in modern terms! We will be tempted by Satan and we WILL fail. God knows this, He actually expects it from us almost. However, Jesus knows and loves us so much, that He still prays for me knowing I will fail Him! I don't know if that talks to your heart but that talks wonders to mine. I think about people that just rub me the wrong way, over and over again or how about someone from my past that has really hurt me. How quick I am to banish them from my life and loose any possible link to them. I can't imagen praying over and over again for that person, knowing they will still continue to hurt me.

Our God is so amazing and everyday I am just blown away by Him more and more! Well, think that is enough for now... but pretty sure tomorrow's blog will still be on this passage because man, there is just so much in these two sentences! WOW!!! I am still in awe!!! My mind is still in over-load just trying to grasp everything in those two verses.

Prayer Requests...

1) Mara's dad had surgery yesterday... Pray for his recovery and for the family. I can't imagen all the emotions they must be going through.

2) Andy's mission trip down in Mexico. Whatever God has planned for that man, I pray it's amazing and something sensational. Also still pray for Faith and Chad's recovery too and getting thier lives back in order.

3) Mel, a girl from my church. She has a lot of things going on around her and really just needs to know that people are praying for her. SO let's send so many prayers and blessings her way, that it will be a little overwhelming for her! Plus she asked for prayer... so when someone steps out for prayer. You know they need it!!!! SO PRAY!

4) My move... pray that everything that needs to get done, gets done and whatever I think I should worry about, turns into a blessing and maybe a good laugh!

Thank you Jesus... I can't wait for more time with you tomorrow!

I'm feeling a little sheepish today!!!

Today wasn't one of my best days ever. It also wasn't even my worst day ever. It was just one of those days, where you watched the clock and swear the hour hand was going backwards instead of forward. I don't know if it's just because I have so much on my plate right now with church, volenteering, being a mom, school and work or if it's just the fact that I seem to of hit a wall of apathy. Whatever it is... today everyone at work noticed. Everyone noticed so much, that it got annoying!

I think it's lovely that everyone knows me as the girl who smiles all the time, but man, can't I have a down day. A day where I just show no emotion at all. I wasn't mad or sad or anything... I was just there to work today. By the seventh to a millionth person asking me... "Christina What's wrong? Where's your smile!" I wanted to go off and scream at people... "NOTHING IS WRONG WITH ME! LEAVE ME ALONE!!!" It was a hard day!

At one point, I actually had to leave the floor to go pray because I felt myself thinking and feeling things that aren't me. I was getting mad at people caring about me. I was getting frustrated at people for showing concern. When I started to pray and ask for guidance with myself, the whole ordeal made me realize I wasn't there at my job for Jesus! I was missing my purpose of being there today, by a mile if not longer!!!!

See yesterday pastor Vaughn said something that just struck a cord with me "If you leave work mad or unsettled about a days hard work, you weren't at work for Jesus. You were there for the money and yourself." How true is that!!! That just really brought new light on me and so much conviction !!! I just really need to remember people expect my smile everyday. That's my gift God gave me, so when I hide it... I can understand why people are concerned! Plus maybe concerning comments were God hints to me saying... "Hello, Your missing ME today! Bring your focus back to ME" I don't know ... whatever it was today... I just hope tomorrow and the rest of the week is better.

The one thing that I did learn from today's ordeals is... I have a huge pet peeve about people asking you a question. You giving them anwser your anwser. Then them deciding that anwser wasn't good enough for them, so they pry... Here something to know about me, if I give you an anwser. That's the truth!!!!!!!!! I don't have an issue with holding anything back and then most of all, don't try to play Dr. Phil on me! That just doesn't go over well with me, even if I am smiling !!!! I think that was the hardest thing for me to deal with today. Anyways... just wanted to vent... thanks for reading... I am praying that tomorrow is a lot better than today.

Initiative 1000... I'm speechless!!! I know surprising!

Washington Initiative 1000, also known as I-1000, is an initiated state statute that will appear on the November 4, 2008 ballot in the state of Washington. The official ballot measure title refers to the measure as "aid in dying." Supporters of the measure refer to it as the Death with Dignity initiative, but critics refer to it as the Assisted Suicide initiative.

Initiative 1000 would allow mentally competent, terminally ill adults the legal choice to request and self-administer a lethal overdose of medication. In 1991, Initiative 119, a similar (but broader) measure, failed with 46% of the vote. The 2008 ballot initiative is more restrictive in that it explicitly prohibits euthanasia and lethal injections.

The initiative is based on Oregon Measure 16, which Oregon voters passed in 1994. Oregon is the only state to have enacted similar legislation. and overwhelmingly re-approved after a U.S. Supreme Court challenge in 1997. (wikipedia)

WOW... When did we become God?

When did we lose so much faith in our God?

In the many years that I have worked in a hospital, I have seen my share of miracles, suffering and yes, moments that made me question GOD, why? However, in no way was I ever in the right frame of mind to play GOD! I can't imagen sitting in front of God on judgement day and having God ask me... "So when did this make sense to you because I still had plans for them? I still need them on earth!"

"OOPS!" Yeah, not sure that response will work at that moment.

On the other hand... meaning my nursing side.... there are moments where I feel like, "okay God... it's their time, let them go to you!" In those moments, more often than none, I always learn that my patient who was lying in that bed. Who was unresponsive to any person's voice, touch and/or me giving them comfort-care measures. They always seemed to wait for something. Whether it was that last family member located on the other side of the world, racing to say their good-byes or my patient seemed to wait for someone to say, "okay it's time... we're okay with your passing!".

From my experience, God has shown me that he has plans with everyone up till that moment we take our last breathe. If God wanted us sooner, He would of called us sooner! That's just my thoughts!!!!

So when your at that voting booth... know what your voting for and pray before you mark the boxes or circles! Those votes count and that's your voice, so know what your saying to the world!!!!

Purpose, Expectations and A Feeling of Relief!

Two days ago, I found myself on the couch of my neighbor, wiping her tears away and hugging on her. See as the words about my future move flowed past my lips, those words brought tears to her eyes. I started to ask God, WHY? Why is it, that when He asks stuff from us or blesses us. Those blessings sometimes bring tears or feelings of saddness or sometimes questions.

As I watch this amazing lady tear up in fear that she may never see me again. I tried my best to encourage her and tell her that I would never forget her and promised to visit all the time. As I left her house and looked down my block of amazing neighbors that have loved on my daughter and me for the last three years almost. I realized that there would be more tears of saddness coming my way, when I informed the rest of them. I was a little wiped out from Nancy's visit and maybe a little chicken too, but I decided to hold off on the rest of those good byes till today.

So as I try to capture the right words to say and how I will convience these amazing people that I will never forget them and thank them for all the many memories. God anwsered my question this morning....

God gives us Purpose and Expectations throughout our lives. Sometimes that feeling of purpose, don't show up till the end of the journey. These goodbyes I hvae to make, make me realize that I was placed in this neighborhood on purpose. I was here because God wanted me here. Even though, I thought it was me doing it, IT WASN"T!!! Mylah brought so much life back to this AARP section of the valley. As Nancy's fear of not getting the chance to see Mylah grow into an amazing woman of God. I realized, that Mylah had so much purpose for these peoples' lives. God reminds me of the summers where the neighbors sat on their porches and watched my little girl play in the water. They watched and loved on Mylah so much. That little girl was another grandchild to a lot of these amazing neighbors. There was so much laughter on this block, due to watching Mylah learning and growing in front of our eyes everyday.

Then God reminded me of my mission trip to New York City in 2002. How I felt so lonely and useless there, thinking that I was wasting my time and questioning God everyday about why I was there. I remember a couple of times, crying myself to sleep because I was homesick. However, it wasn't till the bus ride home from Seattle, that I learned about my purpose. As we were sharing our favorite moments of the trip, I had two of my room-mates tell me that they were blessed having me there with them. Johnathan said that he learned so much by watching me with people. I remember him telling me, that it amazed him about how I never judge a single person and treated everyone with love. Than Spears told me, that it stunned him to watch how people felt so comfortible with me. Even a little trip on a subway or bus and I could get a person spilling their guts in laughter and joy about life.

As more people shared with me about their moments of amazement... I started to cry! Realizing that during that whole trip, even though I felt like I had no purpose there. I actually had more purpose than what I was giving myself credit for. God had purpose for me in New York. God also couldn't share that purpose with me because honestly, I would of screwed it ALL up and maybe, would of tried too hard to be me. Hope that makes sense? If not, just nod your head and move on. lol

So today as the words of Good Bye flow through my lips to my neighbors. I will know that even though this is sad and a little unsure moment in my life. I have to know God has a plan and purpose for Mylah and me. Even if sometimes, I don't understand it right away. Sometimes those reasons of God's aren't shown for days, months, even years but God will share them with you, in His time. So when I'm at work tomorrow or saying Hello to my neighbors or walking down the street today.... I need to remember, God put me there for a reason and purpose. It might seem like I'm doing nothing but OUR God has more amazing plans for our lives than anything we could dream up. I hope this gives you peace, like it has for me!
Prayer Requests still.......

1) Mara's dad, Gerald surgery tomorrow!!! qaudrupal heart surgery!!!

2) Andy and his mission trip down in Mexico... Pray for peace over his mind and heart. He's in God's hands right now and God is doing amazing things through him. Then his sister, Faith and Chad's recovery and peace over trying to get thier lives back in order!

3) My move!!!! Pray it goes smooth and if it doesn't... pray that I get a couple laughs out of all the stress that comes from moving! You can never laugh enough!!!!

Autumn Bring New Questions!

I woke up this morning to an amazing sunrise and a beautiful little girl drooling next to me. As I sat there in my room, starting to think about the long list of things I need to get done today. I started to realize how crazy my life has changed in the last few months. God has been doing amazing things in my life.

Lately I have been just teaching myself about God's calling for me and learning about how much I am loved. The lesson yesterday was about Gideon and how he asked God, "Why me and are you real?" As I read the passages at the beginning of Judges 6... I wonder to myself, why is it... that in the past, they were able to test God and God requests. They were able to check with God and know for sure... yes, this is what I am hearing and I am not going nuts.

Ministry is an amazing please to be and I really feel fortunate to be called that way. I just think that it is a huge commitment and I don't want to do it on my own will. So like Gideon tested God, this morning I told God. Okay, if this is what you want for me. I am going to let you guide me and prove to me this is what I am hearing. I will also be waiting to hear about where I belong in God's kingdom here on earth. I just hope that as I continue this amazing walk, that God sends me more amazing people to guide me and help me blossom.

I am just going to trust that God has my best interest in hand. I just wish, they involved Andy. Hey God, do you hear me... I want a guy like Andy in my future. A guy so in love with you, that I need to search you first before loving him. Please lord, I want a God fearing man, that will love me, like you command in the bible. Thank you Lord Jesus, for what I have experienced and what you have in my future... I will wait for Your response!

Thanks... your little terrible two child!!!

ME

I'm Moving!

Okay... three days ago, I was happy as pie about my place of living. Never even thought about moving till I bought a house. Turns out, God had other plans for me. Yesterday it was brought to my attention about another home that was going up on the market, which was twice the size of my house, way cheaper and really more secure. Which is something huge for me!!! Plus its closer to my parents, church and school. Really excited about that and can't wait. Told my landlord tonight and will be moving on the last weekend of November... So let's pray, the snow holds off till then! Anyways... huge praise report and I wasn't even praying for that! Now that it amazing for me!