So today as I really tried to dig myself out of the snow and thought to myself... "You know, my dad taught me how to drive. I can get through this mess in my little Cavalier." God stepped in and went, "Okay really." And that's when my shovel broke! Mind you, I don't have one of those $20 Walmart Specials... I have a heavy duty... take out a truck in one swipe kind of shovel. This thing is totally, suppose to be winter proof and take on snow hills like I have in my front yard. So what happened.... Some might call it a little intervention on God's part, others might call it coincidence... ME I think God was really trying to tell me this morning to just chill and relax at home with the munchkin.

Well, being determined and knowing that the hospital isn't going to shut down because of the snow.. I decided that my next best option was the city bus. So here I am looking on-line, checking out the times, watching the news in the background telling me over and over again, "Unless you really need to go out today, we recommend that you stay in at all cost." I once again... ignore the messages and proceed on with my mission to get to work.

I have totally planned out... I am going to walk the 7 blocks to Wesley catch the bus to Gilbert's house to drop Mylah off. Then proceed onward to work via STA. Nice... totally a foul proof idea. Up till the newscaster shares all the bus routes that where being cancelled today. Guess who's plan now become UN-fool proof. You got it... I had to throw in the towel. There was nothing else I could do but hear the Big Man's command and stay home.

Being a little upset, okay who am I kidding... I was pissed... I really decided that the best thing for me to do was go and talk to God. Now I didn't go to GOD and say... "Hey what's up with all this snow?" No... I went to Him a little humbled and feeling stupid for not just listening the first time. It wasn't God's deal to make me miss work today. It was just God idea to say... "look this is out of your hands, stop trying to control this!" As I sit there praying and learning from this mornings little moment, I realized that I do this a lot. I seem to have a hard time letting God do His work in me. I have found in the last few months, moments where I honestly thought... "So yeah... God... I Got this!" or even worst, walking in front of God and yelling back... "Dude (GOD), your holding up traffic... could you walk a little faster and get up here, PLEASE!" It's interesting when I think about all the moments in my life where I have done this.

The real eye opening moment this morning was me coming to realize that my first option typically is to handle an issue on my own. It's like I think to myself, "God has better things to deal with than handle my little issues in life. I'll wait till I really need Him there to use up that "Prayer Card!" "

YIKES...

It's like I really believe that there is this bank account of prayer savings and can only be used in time of need basis. Man was that a huge cookie to chew this morning. As God just loves on me and takes a little bit of my pride away... I couldn't help but wonder, "How in the world can one God love such a crazy girl like me?" I know that is crazy to think but really...

In the last few months, I have fought more with God than I really care to admit to. I have said some not so nice things and even found myself, every once in a while telling God, "NO... I'm not doing that!" However, God always in HIS amazing way... just loves on me till I get it. Till I get hit so hard between the eyes with the truth of how much God loves me. So once again... Christina finds herself in tears before her Father. Sometimes... even the people who really do believe that God is their number one compadray... can be holding back more than they care to admit too. God still at work in this girl's life.

On another side note:

Andy is back in my life. This time, God has really just blown my socks off with this blessing. A couple months ago, when I yelled and couldn't understand God's wants in my life. Here He comes and hands me back that blessing again but with interest! I now not only still have my Andy, who loves me like the day we said, "Goodbye". I also have an amazing little girl named, "Maria to add to my heart!" He adopted a beautiful little girl, who I have to say looks so much like Mylah... it's scary! So I am now starting a new chapter in my life with two huge blessings being added. That to me is such a huge testament itself on how much God loves me. He gave me a man more amazing than what I could ever ask for and another little girl to love on like Mylah. I don't think I could of even done it better, if God had given me the chance. God made it better and more amazing. God is awesome and I feel His blessings this morning for sure, even with all this snow! **SMILE**